Forums / Fun! / Forum Games

Attention, this is the principal speaking. Class will begin in 5 minutes.

"Sorry, I'm too school for cool!" Flips out the window on a skateboard, plummeting to my death as the classroom was on the fourth floor of a notably tall building. "Oh, shiiii….." Faded through the air right before a crash and a crunch was heard.

The teacher sighs. "And that, children, is why we don't allow indoors skateboarding."

Herr Schulleiter

Frau Hilda says that we are losing the war and the Soviets will be invading us soon.

Is that true?

sigh "No. We lost the war 60 years ago."

"Why were we fighting in Vietnam, Herr Schulleiter?"

"How the fuck should I know? I teach Math, not History!"

"Anyways, today we're having a pop quiz. Pull out your notebooks."

"I'm an avenger! And someday, I am going to restore my clan! If you get in my way, I'll kill you!"

sigh "Don't make me tap the sign!" points at large sign reading "No weebs allowed in classroom"

A tear in the fabric of reality appears in the back of the room and Kommando_Kaijin, with the addition of numerous horns, antlers, sharpened teeth, skulls, claws, bony metallic wings and tortured faces frozen in painful grimaces to his usual armor.

"After an eternity in the endless agony of the great beyond… I have returned…" He says through a spiked gas-mask filter that seeps black, coagulated blood.

Kommando walked back to his seat and sat down, leaving ashen footprints and broken floor tiles with every step. Faint whispers emanated from underneath his armor.

"What… did I miss?" He asked as the lenses of his gas mask briefly flickered to a brighter shade of purple as more blood seeped from the filter.

"Herr Schulleiter's making us do a pop quiz."

"I hope it's about how to use a panzerfaust or how to operate a flakvierling. I'm good at those."

A group of kids from the last row, all dressed in Japanese school uniforms or clothes with anime prints, stand up with a sigh and leave the classroom. "Baka gaijin," a guy in an ahegao hoodie murmurs as he walks out, closing the door behind him.

Muffled Caramelldansen can be heard playing from the corridor, slowly fading into the distance as the weebs walk down the hallway.

Kommando leaned towards Soup King, staring at him with a soul-piercing intensity and the glare of a man who had seen things that should never be as much as thought of on a regular basis for decades on end.

"That will not save you…" He said as violet electricity crackled from the lenses of his gas mask down to the very tips of his clawed gauntlets. "…From the beyond…"

Kommando then snapped his head to a spot on the wall separating the classroom from the hall. He held out his hands and drew them towards him, as he did a person was dragged through the wall and dropped at Kommando's feet. Kommando then spread his arms out to his sides and more of the violet electricity leaped along his arms. "You dare come for me?" He yelled at the person, who was now floating in the air and struggling to break free from the invisible forces restraining them. "I… am… avarice! I… am… spite!" Kommando announced as his eyes began glowing and the person suddenly ignited and dissolved into a thick, viscous liquid that was sucked into the lenses of Kommando's gas mask. "AN ETERNITY OF PAIN AND DEATH!!!" Kommando shouted as blood began pouring from his filter at an increased rate. He sat back down and his chair and desk slid to the back of the room. The chair he sat in expanded and became softer until it was eventually a large and elaborate-looking canape with a coarse, metallic frame and cushions made out of material that was some sort of impossible combination of leather and a fine, soft fabric. The desk had also expanded into a similarly ornate and expansive table. Curtains seeped out of the ceiling tiles and shrouded Kommando's area as a purple glow began emanating from behind him. Kommando made one last gesture of his hands and suddenly Shirley, Sharla, Amelie, Azraella, J, Kitty Hawk and Castiellea found themselves in the room with him.

"I was beginning to feel very lonely…" Kommando said as a large PC emerged from the floor and started running emulators for various consoles. "…Won't someone join me?" He asked as he booted up a Garry's Mod server and his OCs all found themselves sitting next to him with a similar PC in front of them, joining the server he had just started. Surrounded by his creations and finally finding an opportunity to relax instead of fight unspeakable horrors to the death for once, he announced in a pleased tone: "Now this is an accommodation fit for a Warlord Champion!"

With the Kommando and his group having retreated to a sequestered area of the room, a group of other students turned and stared at his strange arrangements in confusion.

"Attention, this is the principal speaking. There is some white kid shooting up the school. We will hve this under control shortly. Until then, seal the doors and remain in your classrooms." indistinct mumbling "(Who are they for?)" indistinct mumbling "(Oh, okay.) We have received packages addressed to the students named Kommando_Kaijin, Amelie, Shirley, Sharla, J, Castiellea, Azraella, Soup King, and C_Mill24. Could those students please get those packages? (And maybe kill that stupid genocidal incel while they're at it.)"
The PA system is turned off. The teacher quickly begins moving boxes to the front of the class. "Alright kids, you heard the principal. Get some weapons, get your packages, and hopefully kill the school shooter! Just grab a box, I labelled them to keep track of the contents."
(Note: there is one of each box)

BOXES

"Meh, no package for me…" Nigel grumbled.

Okay everybody, select a box already!

QUEST MENU

The teacher pulls out another box. "I guess Nigel could go with you."

Kommando walked through the hole in the wall, closed his eyes and disappeared. Her reappeared behind the school shooter, who turned around to see what was behind him. But as soon as he did, Kommando vanished leaving nothing but faint laughter int the air. The school shooter cautiously walked further down the hallway until he stopped at the sight of Kommando towering above him at the end of the hall. He opened fire but his rounds merely dissipated into flashes of light as soon as they touched Kommando's armor. Kommando raised his hand and the shooter's firearm flew from his hand and landed in Kommando's. He closed his hand around it and opened his palm again to reveal a hideous demonic birdlike creature that fluttered away and into a vent. Kommando then chuckled and vanished again. A psychedelic glow emanated from behind the shooter and he turned around to see what it was. He was immediately greeted by the site of the most beautiful woman he had ever seen standing in front of a tear in the fabric of reality, who then walked towards him and wrapped him in her arms. He began to return the embrace when suddenly, he was being pulled. The woman began laughing evilly and they both flew into the tear which closed behind them, trapping the shooter in the incomprehensible Hellscape with the succubus, who was delighted to have a new meal.

Kommando returned to his seat and resumed his LAN party.

"What was that about, Kommando?" Shirley asked.

"Oh, nothing." Kommando responded.

QUEST MENU

"Oh yeah!" Nigel darts forward, grabbing the box which is labelled "NINJA".

He unpacks its contents and proceeds to take off his black shirt, wrapping it around his head as a makeshift ninja mask. Now properly dressed he decides to test his newly acquired weapons by throwing a couple of shuriken at the classroom's bulletin board and slicing a globe in half.
"Watashi wa ninja desu, hai!" the shirtless ninja yells triumphantly and bows before the slain globe.